When real life comes knockin’
Real life sometimes gets in the way of my online presence these days. But I have found I’m a much more happy and productive person without this contraption strapped to me.
I decided the other day to cut my internet usage way down. I’m talking going from 10 hours (Ok some days more) to about 2. I’ve been spending more quality time with my girls. An agenda that is much needed and long over due. They aren’t getting any younger and neither am I. I want to see the world from outside the confines of my house. So I am.
We have been spending a lot of time here lately with hubby’s brother and his family. It’s been a very nice change from the mundane life we normally lead. I have so much going through my head that I want to do, but just not enough hours in the day to do it.
Today what started out as a simple trip to hubby’s parents took a turn for the worse, then better. Two of hubby’s family members were in dire need of money. I’m talking no lights or water. So since we have acquired a little bit of money, we decided to help them out in their time of need. I was always raised that no good deed goes unrewarded. I truly believe in that.
But of course in helping one, some others got angry. Oh freakin’ well. I don’t give a shit and personally think what was done was cruel. No one should be “taught a lesson” in a 110 heat index week. Sorry I don’t roll that way.
But enough rambling from me. I’m not far from heading to bed. I just finished helping Jellybean “frost” her hair. Blonde..blonde. I’m around in a sense, just not as much as I used to be. Hey real life finally came knocking and for once, I opened the door.
Tore up from the floor up
Today is Sunday. It has taken me probably half the day to recuperate from last night. Well all yesterday actually.
First it started off with swimming at my sister in laws. Oh we had a blast. I gave Shorty some much needed swimming lessons. I swear that kid is just like her daddy, hard headed and sinks like a rock. Hopefully we can fix that soon.
Secondly, I got wasted last night. It’s not that often when I let my hair down and drink. I got a wild hair up my ass last night. It started out pretty mellow. Just a few wine coolers to relax with. Then someone broke out with the George Dickel. Oh hell. Before I knew it, someone was pouring us ladies double shots. Needless to say I was a little fruity and completely tore up from the floor up.
We finally crawled in around midnight. I crawled up on the couch. Wild Child was a dear and brought me two advil before I fell asleep. Jellybean turned off the lights, TV and home theater surround sound thingy so I could go to sleep. I love my kids.
I woke up this morning feeling fine. No hangover. Really the only problem I have is a minor earache that I have been dealing with for a few days now. Funny though it only hurts when I go outside. I think it has something to do with allergies or something like that. Maybe it will go away in a day or two.
They can draw a crowd
Yesterday was a day full of activities for us. We came into a little bit of money and decided to do a few things for ourselves for a change. First things first, all four of us girls went to get a hair cut. It’s been quite some time since I have had mine cut. And I got it cut off. It’s short in the back but longer on the sides. I got so gosh darn embarrassed at the barber shop though. I normally kept my hair pulled up in a pony tail. I could hide the grays that way. Well as she was fixing my do, I noticed how dominant the grays were. I came straight in and finally colored it. Looks good I might add.
After I colored my hair and rested for a few, we made the fatal mistake of taking the girls shopping in the mall. We were supposed to be only looking for bathing suits. They looked at everything from shoes to Mp3 players, purses, clothes… you name it. We were there for hours. I myself had a good time, hubby on the other hand was not as amused.
They have this Hurricane Force Wind simulator in the mall. Two out of the three was brave enough to get in it. I wished you could have seen the crowd that gathered to watch my two goofballs in that contraption. It was funny.
Today we are taking the girls swimming at my sister in laws. We were going to the lake, but we are under a heat advisory for the day and the lake is about an hour or so away. Sister in law only lives roughly 10 minutes away. Only makes sense to me. Well that’s it for now, I will post pics later of the day at the pool.
Tonight, I’m too scared to fall asleep.
There’s no boogie man or monsters hiding in my closet or underneath my bed. But instead they reside in my head.
After waking up at 7 something this morning, I decided to take a nap while everyone was still sleeping. I had no intentions really of falling asleep.
I woke up about 2 hrs later crying in my sleep. Hubby rolled over to caress me and I told him to back off. I had had a nightmare involving my past and my family.
It was a hellish nightmare of kidnapping and torture.
I spent the vast majority of the day very sullen as I didn’t want to interact with anyone. I pretty much wanted to be left alone to sort my thoughts and dream out. Hubby though (in his caring way) decided it was best to keep provoking me until I told him. He in turns tells me it was just a dream and to get over it. Of course he would say that, because I left out telling him a lot of the dream.
In my dream, Shorty and I were kidnapped by my father. No biggie, but I haven’t seen the man in over 14 years. Shorty has never laid eyes on him. In my dream, he takes me to this strange place and starts abusing me. As I finally get up the courage to leave with Shorty, we are going up a hill and there is a truck. I call for help. There are three men. One of them a much younger hubby. He calls for the others to grab me and “go have fun” with me. I was raped in my dream.
I haven’t had the ability to shake that all damn day long. I know why some of it was brought on. A conversation where my father was brought up. And a movie we watched yesterday. But even though it’s just a stupid dream, it is still bothering me tonight.
I have thought all day about taking my panic medicine. I don’t want to. But I don’t want to fear going to sleep tonight and the nightmares that may follow me there. I have contemplated taking 2 Tylenol PM’s or 2 Benadryl’s to knock me out (1 usually does the trick) so I will fall into a deep enough sleep I won’t remember even if I do dream.
Life for me right now is complicated. But that’s nothing unusual. Maybe hubby is right, maybe I am making a mountain out of a mole hill. But then again, he doesn’t have to live with nightmares and memories floating around in his head. I know he means well. I know he loves me. But sometimes I wished he would just listen and shut up. Ok, I have brought on the waterworks here. If I don’t get off here I will need a boat or drown. Sucks to be me sometimes.
Bad Blogger (Freeze ‘n Snip winner too)
I have been such a bad blogger. I have been putting off closing the Freeze ‘n Snip contest since Sunday. For the most part I have been working on a few other projects but yesterday I will admit, I was just lazy and didn’t wanna see the internet, so I chilled with the girls!
Here is the winner of the Freeze ‘n Snip:
Congrats MRS.MOMMY, check your email !!
Happy Birthday to you!!
Eight years ago, a little bitty girl was brought into my life. Who knew that such a small creature could have such a huge impact on me.
Dear Shorty,
Happy Birthday baby girl. It doesn’t seem like you should be 8 years old today. I still remember the day you were born. You were so tiny and to look at you getting so big now.
You are the love of my life. Bug, I have watched you grow. I have watched you become an independent girl. You are learning new things every day and it amazes me to watch your eyes light up.
I never dreamed of having a daughter who loved football so much. You know everything there is to know about Alabama football. You know the players, their numbers and in a year or two, I’m pretty sure you will know their stats. I would love to hear you doing the Tide sports casting one day.
Sweet pea, I Love you!! And I hope you have a great birthday. The Big 8.. wow.
I love you!!
Mommy
I honor you on this day!
To my husband (or main hunk of a redneck as Jyl likes to call you),
Today is a day that we honor Fathers. As I don’t have one in my life to honor, I thought I would honor you.
From day one, you have always been the type of father to our girls, that I wished I had. With Jellybean, you were so over protective. You wouldn’t let her walk without her shoes on. You fussed if I let her lay around naked if it were hot. You would take and make everyone leave the room if she needed changing.
Then Wild Child came along. You were growing a little more laid back with the second one. Still over protective, but you let loose just a tad. With Shorty, all bets were off. You had finally grew comfortable with being a dad.
Over the years, you have fixed what they broke. You coached their T-ball team even though you had no desire to be out there. You kissed boo boos and chased off boyfriends. You have sat up late at night just chatting with each of the girls. You have taught them the basics of mechanics and have taught them to be independent women.
You have encouraged them throughout the years to believe in themselves and that they could be anything they wanted to be. You are pushing them to become outstanding young adults.
I could not have chosen a more perfect man to father my children. Yes you get irritated with them. Yes you scream they take too long getting fixed up. Yes you have never changed a shitty diaper a day in your life. But you always have and always will love my girls unconditionally.
Honey, thank you. Thank you for being the BEST FATHER IN THE WORLD!!
Love you always,
Sassy
Don’t Bite Me Patches Winners
Hotter than a well diggers……………
Do you see that? It’s gonna be hotter than a well diggers ass in mid Junvember. I don’t mind the heat. However when you are push mowing the grass because the riding mower is having a hissy fit. Then you realize just how hot it is.
Yesterday afternoon, we had not one but two push mowers going at once. Every time I would sit down, my glasses would fog up. Coming into a house where the AC was kicking at a cool 72 degrees would sent me shivering.
And trying to do something with your hair in this humidity. Oh don’t even bother. You will look like the Bride of Frankenstein no matter what you do. Don’t ya just love the summer heat?
Look Whose Talkin’